2012 Mel-Kiper-Style GOP Presidential Draft Rankings

From my first column on TheBlaze.com

Below is my 2012 Big Board Presidential Draft Rankings and Analysis for Team Cain. My General Manager, South Carolina Senator Jim DeMint, and I have talked it over and this is who we’ll select if given the opportunity.

Note – Senator DeMint disqualified himself from the Big Board by saying that openly gay people and unmarried but sexually active women shouldn’t teach in public schools. Not, um, my style. But as a maverick political GM, who bucked the GOP establishment, and found Rand Paul, Marco Rubio, Ron Johnson and more – he can GM of any of my teams.

Note 2 – Senator Jim DeMint had nothing to do with this incredibly long column.

137. John Thune, Senator from South Dakota

John Thune is what you get if you had a machine that spit out superficially perfect Republican presidential candidates. You can just imagine Karl Rove hunkered over the motherboard turning the dials to “Optimal Candidate.” Finely tailored Hickey Freeman and/or Brooks Brothers (American made, of course) suit – check. From the Heartland – check. Perfectly parted hair – check. Invokes Reagan at the right time and/or often – check.

Thune looks perfect. He superficially defines “Republican Presidential Candidate” the same way William Zabka defined 80s movie bad guy in Karate Kid, Back to School, European Vacation, etc. The problem is, I don’t know if Thune is anything more than that image.

To see the entire column, click here.

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